Junker. Not a boat, but a sinking feeling.

Who is Jean-Claude Junker? You don’t know? Don’t worry, most people in Europe don’t know… that he’s the President of the European Commission! Yes, JCJ is the most senior and powerful Eurocrat, the man in charge of the whole EU, and yet practically no one knows who he is.

Well, no one did. But that is changing, because, while here in Britain Brexit is being blamed on David Cameron, in Europe the blame is increasingly being laid at the door of this faceless Britain hater, whose intransigence made the Remain campaign so difficult and whose pronouncements were so extreme, they were widely disseminated by those urging Leave.

There are many people to blame for Brexit, but one of the main ones is a man who failed his own country (Luxemberg), whose stated mission is to make the EU less accountable and who has never hidden his hatred for the UK and her people.

As such, I think it is time for this man to get a wider audience, let people know who he is. And how to do that? Through jokes of course. Below is my contribution, feel free to spread widely!

The first ditty, to the tune of “There was an old man called Michael Finnegan”:

There was an old man called Jean-Claude Junker
Who hated Britain from his EU bunker
And even if Brexit’s Britain’s second Dunkirk
Everyone now knows that Junker’s a wunker

(click for my beautiful rendition of it!)

Knock knock
Who’s there?
Jean-Claude Junker
Jean-Claude Junker who?
I am president of the European Commission, how can you not know who I am, I’m important, I’m important, I’m important!

Why did Jean-Claude Junker cross the road?
Because everyone in Europe blames him for Brexit

What’s the difference between Jean-Claude Junker and Nigel Farage?
One is an unaccountable Eurocrate, supping from the EU gravy train who is responsible for Britain leaving the EU, while the other is only Nigel Farage.

An Englishman, an Irishman and Jean-Claude Junker walk into a bar.
The Englishman walks out. The Irishman turns to Junker and says “I think you might be the butt of this particular joke”.

Jean-Claude Junker, a man who hates Britain so much, he even let Nigel Farage win.

Junker has only got one ball
The other’s in Angela Merkel
He’s tedious, and rather pompous,
And Brexit will be his downfall.

(click for my beautiful rendition of it!)


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